Yesterday I felt great. The first nearly symptom free day (except for the ever present tinnitus) in a couple weeks. My heart was jumping for joy at the realization that I actually am feeling good not for an hour but half the day, then three quarters of a day then (drum roll please) an entire day. Woo hoo! I cleaned our entire wrap around farmer’s porch to get ready for the party to celebrate L’s graduation from University on May 18th.
Then to not overdue things I pulled out a lawn chair and sat in a sun patch with the book that I’m reading. And then it happened. Nature took over and reminded me of the joy of sitting and simply observing and soaking in the beauty around me. I noticed the warm sun but still coolish air of spring; the bunches of daffodils I have planted around the yard in various stages of blooming, the violets just beginning to add their purple faces to the spring show and the leaves of the new allium I planted last fall (my Lyme brain doesn’t remember what color or how tall this variety is supposed to be but I’m grateful I planted it and can’t wait to find out!).
I watched the squirrels running up and down the old and slowly dieing maple tree across the street – look a couple of babies! And I watched and listened to the many birds in the trees around our yard trying to figure out who is making which song. Now, that’s a sweet song and a tiny bird, I can’t quite see it in the sun, a gold finch? Yes a gold finch and now two pairs are at the feeder. I’ve noticed many birds are now coming to the feeders in pairs over the past couple weeks. I can hear the chatter of the red-wing blackbirds, chickadees, and the occasional cardinal call and morning dove coo; I believe the strong voice at the top of the willow is our newest guest the red-bellied woodpecker.
I let the feelings of the warm sun, sounds of the birds and beauty of the blue sky, flowers and greening lawn fill me with joy and I just sat quietly for a bit to breath it all in. I make a mental note that I need to do this more often and remember I don’t need to go anywhere to feel this, just sit in my own backyard . . .